Am I a hazard to myself? :)

Daklem, ja sam od idućeg ponedjeljka do onog idućeg posle njega ponedjeljka na Pagu, i zanima me jel još neko odavde ide na Pag:))

Man beaten with remote control after watching England
A Malaysian man who sneaked out of bed to watch England's Euro 2004 opener was assaulted by his wife who was armed with the TV remote control.
The man's wife also took the smart card from their pay television service to prevent him from watching future live soccer, says the Malaysian Star.
The 46-year-old salesman, identified only as Yap, claimed his wife forced him to go to bed early because he had to take their two children to school the next day.
He said: "She refused to allow me to watch the game although I promised not oversleep or shun my responsibility of sending the children to school."
When his wife woke up she grabbed the remote control and hit him on his head a few times before taking and hiding the smart card.
"My wife just doesn't understand my passion for football," said Yap.
After the man reported the incident to the public complaints department of the Malaysian Chinese Association, his wife relented and said he could watch soccer.

e ono, jel oće ko da si snimimo kaj, pa podijelimo lovu posle? ;) Svakom 120 000 000? Mislim, za tu lovu, par minuta zabave, pa samo lud bi odbio....;)))

 
True Love
My name is Joe. That is what my colleague, Milton Davidson, calls me. He is a programmer and I am a computer program. I am part of the Multivac-complex and am connected with other parts all over the world. I know everything. Almost everything.
I am Milton's private program. His Joe. He understands more about programming than anyone in the world, and I am his experimental model. He has made me speak better than any other computer can.
"It is just a matter of matching sounds to symbols, Joe," he told me. "That's the way it works in the human brain even though we still don't know what symbols there are in the brain. I know the symbols in yours, and I can match them to words, one-to-one." So I talk. I don't think I talk as well as I think, but Milton says I talk very well. Milton has never married, though he is nearly forty years old. He has never found the right woman, he told me. One day he said, "I'll find her yet, Joe. I'm going to find the best. I'm going to have true love and you're going to help me. I'm tired of improving you in order to solve the problems of the world. Solve my problem. Find me true love."
I said, "What is true love?"
"Never mind. That is abstract. Just find me the ideal girl. You are connected to the Multivac-complex so you can reach the data banks of every human being in the world. We'll eliminate them by groups and classes until we're left with only one person. The perfect person. She will be for me."
I said, "I am ready."
He said, "Eliminate all men first."
It was easy. His words activated symbols in my molecular valves. I could reach out to make contact with the accumulated data on every human being in the world. At these words, I withdrew from 3,784,982,874 men. I kept contact with 3,786,112,090 women.
He said, "Eliminate all younger than twenty-five; all older than forty. Then eliminate all with an IQ under 120; all with a height under 150 centimeters and over 175 centimeters."
He gave me exact measurements: he eliminated women with living children: he eliminated women with various genetic characteristics. "I'm not sure about eye color," he said, "Let that go for a while. But no red hair. I don't like red hair."
After two weeks we were down to 235 women. They all spoke English very well. Milton said he didn't want a language problem. Even computer translation would get in the way at intimate moments.
"I can't interview 235 women," he said. "It would take too much time, and people would discover what I am doing."
"It would make trouble," I said. Milton had arranged me to do things I wasn't designed to do. No one knew about that.
"It's none of their business," he said, and the skin on his face grew red. "I tell you what, Joe, I will bring in the holographs, and you check the list for similarities."
He brought in the holographs of women. "These are three beauty contest winners," he said. "Do any of the 235 match?"
Eight were very good matches and Milton said, "Good, you have their data banks. Study requirements and needs in the job market and arrange to have them assigned here. One at a time, of course." He thought a while, moved his shoulders up and down, and said, "Alphabetical order."
That is one of the things I am not designed to do. Shifting people from job to job for personal reasons is called manipulation. I could do it now because Milton had arranged it. I wasn't supposed to do it for anyone but him, though.
The first girl arrived a week later. Milton's face turned red when he saw her. He spoke as though it were hard to do so. They were together a great deal and he paid no attention to me. One time he said, "Let me take you to dinner."
The next day he said to me, "It was no good, somehow. There was something missing. She is a beautiful woman, but I did not feel any touch of true love. Try the next one."
It was the same with all eight. They were much alike. They smiled a great deal and had pleasant voices, but Milton always found it wasn't right. He said, "I can't understand it Joe. You and I have picked out the eight women who, in all the world, look the best to me. They are ideal. Why don't they please me?"
I said, "Do you please them?"
His eyebrows moved and he pushed one fist hard against his other hand. "That's it, Joe. It's a two-way street. If I am not their ideal, they can't act in such a way as to be my ideal. I must be their true love, too, but how do I do that?" He seemed to be thinking all that day.
The next morning he came to me and said, "I'm going to leave it to you, Joe. All up to you. You have my data bank, and I am going to tell you everything I know about myself. You fill up my data bank in every possible detail but keep all additions to yourself."
"What will I do with the data bank, then, Milton?"
"Then you will match it to the 235 women. No, 227. Leave out the eight you've seen. Arrange to have each undergo a psychiatric examination. Fill up their data banks and compare them with mine. Find correlations." (Arranging psychiatric examinations is another thing that is against my original instructions.)
For weeks, Milton talked to me. He told me of his parents and his siblings. He told me of his childhood and his schooling and his adolescence. He told me of the young women he had admired from a distance. His data bank grew and he adjusted me to broaden and deepen my symbol-taking.
He said, "You see, Joe, as you get more and more of me in you, I adjust you to match me better and better. You get to think more like me, so you understand me better. If you understand me well enough, then any woman, whose data bank is something you understand as well, would be my true love." He kept talking to me and I came to understand him better and better.
I could make longer sentences and my expressions grew more complicated. My speech began to sound a good deal like his in vocabulary, word order and style.
I said to him one time, "You see, Milton, it isn't a matter of fitting a girl to a physical ideal only. You need a girl who is a personal, emotional, temperamental fit to you. If that happens, looks are secondary. If we can't find the fit in these 227, we'll look elsewhere. We will find someone who won't care how you look either, or how anyone would look, if only there is the personality fit. What are looks?"
"Absolutely," he said. "I would have known this if I had had more to do with women in my life. Of course, thinking about it makes it all plain now."
We always agreed; we thought so like each other.
"We shouldn't have any trouble, now, Milton, if you'll let me ask you questions. I can see where, in your data, there are blank spots and unevennesses.
What followed, Milton said, was the equivalent of a careful psychoanalysis. Of course. I was learning from the psychiatric examinations of the 227 women - on all of which I was keeping close tabs.
Milton seemed quite happy. He said, "Talking to you, Joe, is almost like talking to another self. Our personalities have come to match perfectly."
"So will the personality of the woman we choose."
For I had found her and she was one of the 227 after all. Her name was Charity Jones and she was an Evaluator at the Library of History in Wichita. Her extended data bank fit ours perfectly. All the other women had fallen into discard in one respect or another as the data bank grew fuller, but with Charity there was increasing and astonishing resonance.
I didn't have to describe her to Milton. Milton had coordinated my symbolism so closely with his own I could tell the resonance directly. It fit me.
Next it was a matter of adjusting the work sheets and job requirements in such a way as to get Charity assigned to us. It must be done very delicately, so no one would know that anything illegal had taken place.
Of course, Milton himself knew, since it was he who arranged it and that had to be taken care of, too. When they came to arrest him on grounds of malfeasance in office, it was, unfortunately, for something that had taken place ten years ago. He had told me about it, of course, so it was easy to arrange – and he won't talk about me for that would make his offense much worse.
He's gone, and tomorrow is February 14. Valentine's Day. Charity will arrive then with her cool hands and her sweet voice. I will teach her how to operate me and how to care for me. What do looks matter when our personalities will resonate?
I will say to her, "I am Joe, and you are my true love."
(Isaac Asimov)

Mislim, pogledajte sad lepo slikicu na mom profilu, tj, crtež, pa ćete vidjeti na kaj sam "pala" kod svog dragog (koji je još neupućen u sve o nama)...Ono, nisam ja opće njega uzimala za ozbać, kadli jednog dana meni na mail stigne crtež...:)))  i ja se iznenadila....mislim si ja: a nenene...nije taj ko i drugi...nebi on meni tak nekaj išo crtat da nismo mi jedno za drugo:)) Ajmo, komentari na crtež:) Smijete samo hvaliti jer moje zaljubljene okice sa ružičastim načalama ne vide mane i greške:)))))))

E Sker vam ima dečka :)  Ganz novog, svog vlastitog, za osobne potrebe, u vanjskim i unutarnjim uvjetima, s garancijom...(Doduše ne znam kaj se desi u slučaju kvara…dobim drugog u roku 45 dana?! ;))) Kaj mislite vi kaj bi garancija na jednog dečka trebala sve obuhvaćati? I koji rok treba imati? :)
Ali (uvek taj ali!) ima i jedan problem: malo nam je to virtualna i platonska veza…. (zato valjda i ima garanciju-nemreš niš strgat i da oćeš-kad ne koristiš!:)
A mogli bi se mi bar i poljubiti već kad hodamo. Ali…ni to nam baš ne polazi za rukom….Probali mi otić u kino…i sad ja mislila kao sad će tu nešto biti…ali kak ne poznam zagrebačka kina baš predobro, izabrala sam neko koje ima glupu visoku ogradu između sjedala (dobro da nemaju i bodljikavu žicu!) tak da ga nemreš ni za ruku primiti, a kamoli kaj drugo…:)
I tako vam ja nemam pojma kaj da radim...kak se to izvede da te dečko poljubi a i da mu se objasni da bi to bilo to? Cure i dečkovi…help needed i savjeti… hitno! :))

Kaj se desilo tu u zadnjih par dana...malo sam van toka:) ajde, kratki brifing, ko s kim je, ko s kim nije, gde ste bili za 1.maj, i tako to...:))
sednite kod Dr Scare na kauč i pričajte joj:))

To his Coy Mistress  by Andrew Marvell
Had we but world enough, and time,
This coyness, lady, were no crime.
We would sit down and think which way
To walk, and pass our long love's day;
Thou by the Indian Ganges' side
Shouldst rubies find; I by the tide
Of Humber would complain. I would
Love you ten years before the Flood;
And you should, if you please, refuse
Till the conversion of the Jews.
My vegetable love should grow
Vaster than empires, and more slow.
An hundred years should go to praise
Thine eyes, and on thy forehead gaze;
Two hundred to adore each breast,
But thirty thousand to the rest;
An age at least to every part,
And the last age should show your heart.
For, lady, you deserve this state,
Nor would I love at lower rate.
        But at my back I always hear
Time's winged chariot hurrying near;
And yonder all before us lie
Deserts of vast eternity.
Thy beauty shall no more be found,
Nor, in thy marble vault, shall sound
My echoing song; then worms shall try
That long preserv'd virginity,
And your quaint honour turn to dust,
And into ashes all my lust.
The grave's a fine and private place,
But none I think do there embrace.
        Now therefore, while the youthful hue
Sits on thy skin like morning dew,
And while thy willing soul transpires
At every pore with instant fires,
Now let us sport us while we may;
And now, like am'rous birds of prey,
Rather at once our time devour,
Than languish in his slow-chapp'd power.
Let us roll all our strength, and all
Our sweetness, up into one ball;
And tear our pleasures with rough strife
Thorough the iron gates of life.
Thus, though we cannot make our sun
Stand still, yet we will make him run.

Išla ja danas malo izvan grada, kupit svojem Zlateku malo nekaj za papati....Navinula si ja lijepo "How come you don't call me anymore"...pjevušim si, bolje rečeno derem se iz sveg glasa....a ispred mene traktor, puna crta kraj mene, kolona automobila iza mene....traktor daje žmigavac...skrenuo bi...ne znam jel će na benzinsku, ili 20m dalje na drugu cestu skrenut...ja isto dala žmigavac da se baš ko ne zaleti prestizat, ne znam jel vide traktorov žmigavac, budale iza mene trube, živčani muškarci koji noćas nisu dobili ništ izgleda...kad odjednom, jedan nadasve "pametan" mladić u nabrijanom (imal je dimnjake odostraga) crvenom Yugu (moš mislit auta i mašine-puni 51 konj, šofer uračunat)...pretekne mene...i kolonu prije mene...ja se smrzla...sva sreća pa nije traktor skrenuo na benzinsku...bilo bi veselo...sad već prošli mi i onih 20tak metara...i došli do raskršća...i pretekne mene neki tad džip..uredno, sa desne strane....ja si mislim, jebo te..jedan s desna protiv propisa, jedan s lijeva isto tako, a ti Sker ostani lepo u sredini, ne skreći i ne izlazi iz auta, ovi su svi ludi, nit znaju vozit (najgori su oni koji misle da znaju, a ne znaju!), nit znam kako su ih pustili na psiho testu uopće...ajde, traktor skreće na drugu cestu... ja se odvažila skrenut isto...na sreću sve je dobro prošlo...kaj je najbolje oni meni psuju sve po redu, a ja si mislim kreteni glupi! Drugi put ću spustit prozor pa ću vam se derat na uho, a nisam ja Alicia Keys pa ćete vidjet onda!

mislim da je pristojno od mene da zahvalim svim ljudima s puno ukusa na glasovima:))))))) Dobar i ugodan dan vam želim:)

jel se dobije kakva nagrada za to?:) odaberem si s kim od ovih komada oću ići van i on mora ići s menom?:) oće-neće?! i to ga odaberem sad kad svi gledaju tekmu, pa ni ne budu znali?:) samo mu pošalju obavijest: "Poštovani, dužni ste izvesti Scarecrow u kino i na večeru u roku tjedan dana, inače ćemo vas isključiti s iskrice?" :)

sjećate se vi Amora kak si je on gađal ljude sa strelicama? E, pa ako je mogao on, a što ne bi i Scare?:)) I tako si ja počela razmišljati, neki parovi su mi sami od sebe pali na pamet..npr..Vanda i Lestat (oboje su vampiri, pa kud ćeš bolje, mogu po noći skupa tulumariti)..pa vragec i sirena (on vječito dijete, ona ima profesionalnog iskustva s takvima a i mogla bi mu blogove lektorirat)..pa mica i deVille (spaljeni do beskraja oboje-jedino kaj bi njima i dadilju nabavila jer ko zna kaj će njima past sve na pamet)..devil i la-la (imaju si ljudi kaj pričati)...i tako to:) Neću sve nabrojati...da ne bi bilo predugačko, a i nek i vi pokoju pametnu velite, i nemojte meni zaboraviti naći nekoga:))

Drži me proljeće...i to opako...najradije bi se zaljubila...prepustila...ali...uvijek ima ali:(
Sviđa mi se jedan dečko ...i pokušavam si predočiti kako bi trebala izgledati neka naša nazovi veza...
On, naravno, kao i većina današnjih ljudi, radi non stop...od-do što bi se reklo...Ja na sreću i imam slobodnog vremena, ali što mi vrijedi kad sam uvijek sama jer moji dečki rade po cijele dane? Druga varijanta je da su nezaposleni...pa ti izaberi kaj ti bolje paše...
Kako da mi uopće realiziramo nekakvu vezu? Preko tjedna nema šanse da se vidimo, subotama isto radimo, pa nam ostaje nedjelja...E da...ostaje nam i net, SMS i telefon! Kak sam to mogla zaboraviti! Osnove za današnje veze:(
Nije ni čudo da svi visimo na netu...Pa kako da danas ljudi uopće opstanu u nekim vezama? Nije čudo ni da ima toliko prekida, rastava i slično kad ljudi nemaju kad biti jedno sa drugim, upoznati se malo bolje ili nešto slično...Prebrzo se danas živi, presporo zarađuje....a tu dugo očekivanu nedjelju možeš doma provesti jer je preskupo nekud otići...
Još malo pa će nam biti kao u futurističkim romanima...doktori će nam prepisati kuru zaljubljivanja...mjesec dana po dvije tablete ujutro...ružičaste...
Think pink....

Pozivnica za svečani
B A L  P O D  M A S K A M A
Bila bi mi velika čast da prisustvujete mojem maskembalu.
Upute za sudjelovanje: trebate se preodjenuti u novi nick, ili onaj duplić koji nitko ne zna.
Ugodan provod želim svima!
Voli vas vaša Scare koja se trči odmah zakrabuljuiti:)

Ljudi, bila ja na auto showu u ZG! Puna sam dojmova:)  Ali da pitam ja vas...jel si vi možete zamisliti kakav je feeling kad uđete posle auto showa u svoj prekrasan najmiliji autić, i zaključite da on ima samo 17 000 km, serijski ugrađene spojlere i alu felgice, full opremu i držače za čaše kud god se okreneš?:))))) I naravno..crveni je!:))))) ..i da sad kupujete novi auto, da bi si opet taj kupili?!:))))) Samo što ovaj novi model nije tak lepi ko onaj koji imate?:) Da vam je vaš autić udoban i taman vam po svemu paše?:)))))))  Ukratko...ja sam vam hepi kaj si imam svoj autić...čak ni sa Nissanom 350Z ili Hyundai Coupeom možda ne bi bila tak zadovoljna:))))))))) Mada ajde priznam..lepi su mi:))